The Act

I’ve never been brave enough to give it all up.

I hold onto this reality like a child

Cradles a baby blanket that no longer

Keeps them warm.

My feet are poking out from under the covers,

Tossing and turning through life,

I’m afraid

When it’s finally time to wake up,

I’ll realize I did not dream enough

Did not allow myself to fall into

Whatever this unknown has to offer.

I want to veer away from the script

And dance on a blank page

Of a sacred text

That is drenched with humility

and dares to confidently not know.

Instead, I cling, with far too much trust in eyes that have lied

I cling to what I see and call it reality.

How scary it is to wrap yourself in fables,

In typical fashion and call yourself a model of truth.

Strutting in your conviction,

Not even realizing the ground you walk on

Trembles in unsureness.

I’m afraid in the end

The safe haven

Will reveal that it’s always felt threatened

That comfort will admit it’s never felt ease,

The light will have only noticed the dark,

The awesome will have felt underwhelmed.

The happy will have always felt weaponized against the sad.

That prayer will have always felt like an echo.

I’ve never been brave enough to give it all up.

And just ask

If existence has ever been offended

That we do not take it seriously unless it has a purpose.